MY WIFE KISSED ANOTHER MAN WHILE WASTED...DID I DO THE RIGHT THING? cannot break up, little kid involved?

I think what you did was ok, though I'm a little ambivalent about the threat of violence against the other guy, I think it's ok in this case to be angry and to express your anger, but I hope you seriously don't hit the other guy. Give this some time. Marriages are based on forgiveness, and I can imagine that you and she can get past this and stay together if you both want to, after things have had time to clear and you stay communicative, which it sounds like you are doing. It may be, though, that her feelings for this guy are going to win out, in which case it's no use trying to force it away because then all you'd have is a resentful wife, right? If divorce does come about, I suggest that you don't try to punish her by restricting her access to the kid purely out of vindictiveness. You will feel better the sooner you forgive. I think you are handling this well so far. Clearly she is just unsure and working through her feelings right now which will take some time and maybe a couple talks with mom and her best girl friend.